Asshat

It’s Friday, ya’ll. I hear this word “Asshat” more and more and I have to say I like it.

But not as much as fuck face. OK. No more cursing now.

So yes, it’s Friday. I’m in the office for 1/2 a day today as I am off to a meeting off-site early this afternoon. And afterwards I’ll be so close to home that I won’t be returning to the office (yay!) and instead, I’ll go to the jewelry store where bub and I purchased our wedding bands. Because after so much talk of people getting engaged recently…ahem…you know who you are…you have inspired me to get my rings steam cleaned and to have a reason to talk jewelry talk with…well…jewelry people. I am very good about cleaning my rings, but sometimes you just need them steamed, you know?

***

I was feeling quite sick yesterday evening so as to cancel plans with a friend who I have not seen in quite a while. It was quite the scene. Bub comes home to find me on the couch in my work clothes with a blanket up to my chin watching Flashdance as though I had never seen it before. I would not talk to him except during commercials (which is so not me) until I realized that that was silly. I’ve seen the movie before and I haven’t seen my husband all day and it’s important that despite my not feeling well, that I hear him out and learn what sorts of things I missed.

Then I turned into a couch bug. I would not get up. So bub had to pry me off the couch. Then I stuck to him in one of those hugs that means don’t let me go. I hurt. I’m cold. I have aches.

So he said let’s get you in your PJ’s. And he started to help me put on my pink fleece sleep things and I thought this is good practice for him if we should ever have kids. He started to pull my turtleneck sweater off when I realized that my hair was going with it. I screamed in pain. Then I told him how this is was supposed to be in preparation if we were to have a daughter some day and he said I don’t think I would be taking off my daughter’s bra.

And that was the end of that.

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4 thoughts on “Asshat

  1. Hahaha! Hillarious.

    Michael sometimes pokes and annoys me and them says it’s practice for when we have kids.

    I’ve worked with kids. They weren’t that annoying!

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